There are quite a few rumors going around as to the cause of the unrest in Egypt. Some say it's the disparity between the rich and poor. Others say that the ongoing suspicion of deep seeded corruption throughout the government created the tension. Still more claim that it is the citizens demanding political reform. Well, I hate to be a know-it-all, but you are all wrong. The true source has been traced to Vin Diesel himself. In a recent, clearly unpopular move, Hosni Mubarak declared that none of Vin Diesel's three upcoming movies, xXx: The Return of Xander Cage, Fast Five, and Riddick, will be shown in Egypt. As we have all seen, the population did not take to kindly to this news, and rightfully so. This could all be ended with a simple retraction of this ridiculous embargo.
With these facts in mind, how could anyone ban Vin?
- Chuck Norris once challenged Mr. T to a fight. Vin Diesel won.
- Vin Diesel has Osama Bin Laden captive underneath Antarctica for questioning.
- Vin Diesel told Leeroy to, "Just go on in."
- Vin Diesel once made a hand-tooled leather vest from the hide of a studio executive who displeased him.
- Put a five year old in a headlock because "his hair was combed funny".
- Vin Diesel is Bill Brasky.
- Vin Diesel controls the New York Stock exchange with his mind, but not the NASDAQ. He controls the NASDAQ with his heart.
- Vin Diesel didn't save any money on car insurance after switching to Geico.
- Vin Diesel is the real Slim Shady.
- Vin Diesel invented menstruation by punching Eve in the stomach.
- If they told Vin Diesel instead of Houston, "We have a problem", he would've fixed it.
- Vin Diesel once made a profit of $2,897 when he opened a lemonade stand. In February.
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